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The best way to improve public health / IELTS essay





Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both view and give your opinion.



According to some people, incorporating more sports programs can provide significant health benefits for the citizens, while others think other initiatives are also needed. In my opinion, gymnastic activities and awareness programmes together can have a useful impact on the welfare of public health.


On the one hand, acrobatic acts stimulate body fitness. While people are obsessed with sports or exercise, they are actually doing physical labour, which burns extra fat and toxins from the physics in the form of sweat or urine; As a result, they will have less chance of falling ill. Likewise, with such work, the human body moves frequently, which relaxes the muscles and remains workable for a long time. Therefore, that kind of facility is amplified, it might encourage many people to participate, and secure their sound health. For instance, a recent survey conducted by WHO demonstrates that the rate of sickness is 50% less among those students, who are associated with gymnasium compared to others.


However, having a balanced diet is equally important. Because, without having nutritious food in the proper amount, the other tasks of fitness might not work properly. That means, if a person eats sugary, oily and carbohydrate-dense meals regularly, he might not have a good shape as well as have enough possibility of disease, despite doing regular exercise. Hence, the authorities need to inaugurate projects to increase the public concern for diet. For example, the government can commence a medical campaign or short film or advertisement regarding the value of obtaining good food.


In conclusion, although overwhelming physical activities might drive humans to keep themselves fit, consuming a healthy diet is required to fuel that act. Nevertheless, neither sports, nor healthy meals alone can secure the community welfare; but, both together can achieve a good result.




11 Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more 0 Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer 0 Mistakes

4 paragraphs 296 words 9 Overall Band Score

COHERENCE AND COHESION: 9.0 9 Structure your answers in logical paragraphs 9 Include an introduction and conclusion 9 Support main points with an explanation and then an example 9 Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately 9 Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

LEXICAL RESOURCE: 9.0 9 Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms 9 Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

GRAMMATICAL RANGE: 9.0 9 Use a variety of complex and simple sentences 9 Check your writing for errors

TASK ACHIEVEMENT: 9.0 9 Answer all parts of the question 9 Present and fully explain ideas 9 Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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